Jumaat, 27 Januari 2012

Lawak Pagi Jumaat : Harga Minyak Dunia Turun Kerana Anwar

Harga minyak dunia dijangka akan melonjak hingga RM 390 satu tong atau 30 % jika Iran meneruskan ancamannya untuk menyekat laluan kapal di Selat Hormuz.

Jika keadaan berterusan subsidi kerajaan Barisan Nasional terhadap minyak negara semakin meningkat untuk mengekalkan harga yang diguna pakai sekarang.

Oleh yang demikian Anwar Ibrahim telah mengarahkan Presiden Obama supaya mengadakan perjumpaan dengan presiden Iran dan semua pemimpin negara pengeluar minyak.

Anwar kata kepada Obama, bahawa Yusoff Qardawi telah berpesan supaya harga minyak dunia diturunkan untuk membolehkan Anwar menurunkan harga minyak. Malah pemimpin parti Islam dari Indonesia, ulama-ulama terkenal termasuk Presiden Turki pun sudah minta Anwar berusaha untuk menurunkan harga minyak.

Kini Husam Musa, telah terbang ke sana ke mana kerana dilantik sebagai pengawai perhubungan kepada penolong pegawai khas kepada ketua penolong pegawai khas dan Ketua Pegawai Khas Anwar ( berapa banyak pegawai khas daaa....) untuk mengaturkan perjumpaan ini dalam masa terdekat.

Anwar yakin beliau mampu menurunkan harga minyak dengan menekankn Obama agar akur dengan desakan Yusoff Qardawi dan lain-lain rakan yang menyokong dan membuat solat hajat untuk Anwar.



SOKONG AUKU, MB AZIZAN KENA MASUK BN!! - AZIZ BARI




Uploaded by lemandecaprio on Jan 26, 2012

http://umb-ppum.blogspot.com
MB Azizan kena masuk BN

Dap dan Pkr makan besar, Pas makan lendir


SELANGOR !! DAP BELI BANGUNAN YAYASAN SELANGOR? [ klik ke blog asal



Yayasan Selangor akan dijual kepada sebuah syarikat luar negara. Khabarnya bakal dijadikan sebagai pejabat baru DAP. Kerajaan negeri PKR-DAP yang kini menerajui PKNS telah mengenal pasti 16 hartanah bernilai RM10 bilion untuk pelaburan Amanah Raya Reit (ARREIT) secara berperingkat.


Bangunan Yayasan Selangor yang terletak di Bukit Bintang akan menjadi mangsa kerakusan pentadbiran DAP-PKR di Selangor.


Peringkat pertama 3 harta bernilai RM270 juta dilaburkan dalam ARREIT. Beberapa pendedahan telah dibuat tentang penyelewengan kuasa dan amanah yang dilakukan termasuklah dalam Laporan Audit Dalaman 2010 mengenasi Yayasan Selangor.





Kit Siang dan Guan Eng sudah berkira-kira berapa untung yang sudah mereka jana di Pulau Pinang dan Selangor. Di Pulau Pinang, Guan Eng sumbat RM100 untuk tutup mulut. Di Selangor, Kit Siang arah Exco Exco DAP sogok RM100 di pasaraya untuk kelabukan mata rakyat. Padahal penyelewengan yang lebih besar disembunyikan.


Rakyat Selangor perlu "mengaudit" kembali harta-harta negeri Selangor. PKR-DAP menjual untuk dapat untung dalam masa yang singkat. Apakah keuntungan ini akan digunakan untuk tujuan pilihan raya? Tambahan Geran Selangorku sejumlah RM300 juta itu untuk apa motifnya?

Woman with Two Vaginas Gets $1 MILLION Porn Offer





What a surprise, the porn industry wants to do some sort of freaky porn movie with the woman with two vagina's.  I work my ass off to support my family, but a woman who can vaginally service two hard ****s at the same time is about to come into a shit load of money. Now that's some trailer shit.
 
A British woman who's become a celebrity in the U.K. because she was born with two fully formed vagina's may finally be able to cash in on her crotch. Hazel recently told British tabloid The Sun that she's not shy about her condition -- insisting she and her husband have shown it off at sex clubs around the U.K.

TMZ: Vivid Entertainment honcho Steve Hirsch ... who heard Hazel's story ... and immediately reached out to the woman with a MASSIVE offer to film her double hoo-ha in action.

In the letter, Hirsch writes, "You are obviously an extraordinary woman and I would like to make you an offer to star in an upcoming Vivid production. We would pay you up to $1 million for your services."


So, technically, she wouldn't be cheating on her husband if she's saves a hole for him? 






(CBS) Hazel Jones made headlines worldwide and raised a few eyebrows last week when she went on a British talk show to discuss her unique medical condition. Jones was born with uterus didelphys, a condition that causes her to have two separate uteruses, cervixes, and vaginas.
Jones didn't even realize the condition was unique until she was 18 and her serious boyfriend told her that something was different. Her mother and doctors hadn't noticed at birth, though once Jones began to have her period, she was faced with a new set of challenges. 



She even asked one of her friends which hole to put the tampon in, causing her friend to make fun of her, thinking she was inserting it rectally, Jones said on ITV's This Morning., "I kept my mouth shut after that for quite a while," Jones said. But every time she had her period, she'd suffer terrible cramps.

"I used to suffer from horrendous cramps and my periods could be very heavy," she said on This Morning. "I now know that my periods were worse because I have two wombs." Dr. Jill Rabin, professor of obstetrics at gynecology at Hofstra North Shore LIJ School of Medicine in New York, told HealthPop that cramps are a telltale sign of uterus didelphys, and often when girls first discover the condition.

What is uterus didelphys? Rabin said the condition is a "failure of fusion" for women. When developing in the womb, a girl's reproductive system starts with two tubes. These tubes fuse and a septum breaks down to form one uterus, one cervix, and one vagina. Hazel's septum never broke down, which gave her two of each. 

Rabin says uterus didelphys isn't as rare as one would think, and estimates suggest one in 3,000 women have the condition. Rabin said that number could be even higher since many women with the condition have one vagina, and may never experience severe cramps, leaving the condition unnoticed until child birth. Women with uterus didelphys are more likely to have a breached childbirth, so a doctor may discover an extra uterus or cervix when performing a C-section.


"It's not that crazy at all, even though it sounds like a sci-fi thing," added  Dr. Vincenzo Berghella, director of maternal fetal medicine at Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia, to ABC News. "We see many couples, maybe one a month or more." ITV reports that by having two vaginas because her septum never disintegrated, Jones's condition may be closer to one in a million in occurrence.

The condition could also cause complications, including miscarriage, according to Rabin. Some women who have two cervixes may develop cramps when the uterus fills up with blood - like a balloon - requiring a medical procedure to drain the blood. Some women with the condition may have an additional uterus that never fully developed and is like a "vestigial" horn, so it's not able to release blood at all during menstruation, causing severe pain and requiring surgery to remove it, Rabin said.
If you have the condition or are experiencing severe menstrual cramps, see a doctor. Rabin says there are a lot of doctors who are used to seeing women with these differences, and can help care for them. Says Rabin, "If you are someone with this, you're far from alone."


I had to laugh when she recounted asking her friend about using tampons - "which hole do you put it in?" If she doesn't take the porn offer there's always Maxi Pad commercials in her future  "When a tampon just wont do, only Maxi Pad can handle the big spills. . . from both holes"